Our Miracle

I have yet to write the story of how our little Ty became our little Ty...so here it goes.
Labor day weekend Drew and I found out that a procedure that we had done for the 4th time...trying to get pregnant...had failed. I can't even explain the depression that comes from this. Feeling crushed and lacking the faith and hope I had previously had, I felt like throwing the towel in. Three days later we received an email from Madison...Ty's birth mom...saying she wanted us to be the parents of her baby. She was due in two days! As you can imagine...this pulled me out of a dark hole.
Honestly, it took a while for it all to sink in. "Is this really happening" is all I kept thinking. And after a mad rush to Babies-r-us to fill our home with baby necessities we got a call on September 13th at 6:00 in the evening saying she had gone into labor. He was born at 11:31 that night. We found tickets that would get us there at noon the following day. We were up all night...not just packing but we couldn't sleep because we were both filled with so much anticipation and excitement. We were so excited yet kept telling ourselves not to get to excited because there was a chance this might not happen for us... Madison would have 5 days after he was born to change her mind.
Madison's father met us at the New Orleans airport so we wouldn't get lost trying to find the small town of Hammond, LA. As we were walking up to the hospital entrance Justin...Ty's birth father...came out to meet us. He was really nice and seemed a little nervous...so were we. When we walked into the hospital room Madison was sitting in bed holding Ty with nine people filling the room...Madison and Justin's parents and some siblings... and all eyes were on us. All we could do was smile. But I don't remember breathing. Madison smiled and without hesitation lifted Ty up and placed him in my arms. He was just as bright eyed and alert as I had ever seen a new born baby. I know babies can't see when they're that young but he was looking right at me. Drew held him and feed him...I had to fight him to hold him again. We stayed with Justin and Madison until about 9:00 that evening just talking and getting to know each other. Justin let us know how hard this decision was for them, but told us that he knew it was the right thing to do and that he knew we would take care of him. Saturday morning we met them at the hospital again as Ty and Madison were both discharged from the hospital.
When they handed Ty to us to take for the remainder of of the five day wait...Justin just lost it and sobbed. Hugging us both and kissing Ty on the forehead over and over again. I can't even tell you the feelings I had inside...I felt so terrible..like I was the bad guy for taking him.
Later that night we went over to Madison's parents house for dinner and met more family members. Her family is amazing...such great people. We were there for several hours. Madison never desired to hold Ty...it was her way of not getting to attached...But at one point Justin placed him in her arms. She held him for about an hour and then I noticed her quietly slip away with him into another room. After about 20 minutes Madison's mom and I went to find her. We found her holding Ty in the dinning room... in tears. Seeing her in this state is a moment embedded in my soul. I had to leave the room because I couldn't hold it in. Madison's dad came and took Ty from her and told me to take him. He then asked Drew to help give her a blessing of comfort.
We left that night with Ty in our arms and after a very emotional day we went to our hotel room and looked at our little guy and fell in love.
I don't think I slept all week. I kept wanting to feel his chest in the middle of the night to make sure he was breathing. We had so much fun staying in our hotel room for a week just the three of us. Drew and I both learning together how to be parents. Both of us wanting to hold him ALL the time. One time I fell asleep on the same pillow Ty was lying on and woke up to him sucking on my nose thinking it was his bottle....so cute!!
So...we were there for nine days in order for them to get all the paper work done. And we spent everyday with Justin and Madison and their families. We grew so close with all of them and felt like we got to know them. They both have such amazing families and this was so hard for them...yet they were so warm to us and wanted us to come over for dinner...lunch...all the time.
This experience was awesome. I was so hesitant of getting so close to Justin and Madison and their families. I'm grateful now because if Ty ever wonders about them I can tell him what they are like and what great people they are.
Now that it has been almost three months since this experience we still keep in touch with Justin and Madison through occasional emails.
But...I almost have forgotten that I wasn't the one who gave birth to him...he's mine...he's ours. And he is so darn cute!! I can't get enough of him. He's our little miracle.